SHORT AND SASSY
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opentheairforfreshwindows:

brave-fart:

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brave-fart:

did you hear about the italian chef who died?

he pasta way

he just ran out of thyme

here today, gone tomato

his wife is still upset, cheese still not over it

we never sausage a tragedy coming

ashes to ashes, crust to crust

there’s just not mushroom for italian chefs in today’s world

spaghetti

(Source: sofunnyimcryan, via hotboyproblems)

"A wise girl kisses but doesn’t love, listens but doesn’t believe, and leaves before she is left."

Marilyn Monroe (via kushandwizdom)

scoobydoof:

mom, dad, can i have a boy girl party this year for my birthday??? i’m gonna be 35 this year and idk i just think i should be allowed to now. 

(via hi)

postllimit:

do you ever get that feeling that you’re the only one who’s actually alive and everybody and everything else you’ll ever see or meet is just a projection of your own brain that does whatever your brain thinks you need to experience? i do.

(via laughbitches)

helpimtrappedinawebsite:

when he is over 6ft tall - Vy Le x

(via filipina-dollface)

"

1. Your skin may never be perfect, and that’s okay.

2. Life is too short not to have the underwear, the coffee, and the haircut you want.

3. Everyone (including your family, your coworkers, and your best friend) will talk about you behind your back, and you’ll talk about them too. It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other.

4. It’s okay to spend money on things that make you happy.

5. Sometimes without fault or reason, relationships deteriorate. It will happen when you’re six, it will happen when you’re sixty. That’s life.

"

Five things I am trying very hard to accept (via aumoe)

(via stay-sassy-x)

"Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed."

Alexander Pope (via feellng)
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